— briefly what happened each day.

• 01.10 | had 2 psych history lectures. my fp asked my friend how i’m doing and asked to say hi from her. bought smirnoff and a coke zero.
• 02.10 | had 3 lectures today, showed how dumb i am today too many times. bought gin & tonic for friday. got prescribed more xanax (1 mg x 30) and all of my other meds.
• 03.10 | had 2 lectures in a new subject and i can already tell i’m gonna be a dumbass in it. had trouble focusing because i was extremly tired. then went to Alfa, bought mcdonald’s.
• 04.10 | went to hesburger with G and K. left uni at like 5.40 pm.
• 05.10 | cleaned the house. mom's colleagues are here and i got high and drunk.
• 06.10 | went to the mall. was in my bed the rest of the day.
• 07.10 | went to the airport to say good bye to mom and sister for 5 days. watched ahs, studied, and watched the latvian x-factor.
• 08.10 | went to uni - psych history, got home, bought coke zero, watched VML and finished AHS: murder house - loved it!
• 09.10 | uni - ethics & biology, went to circle k for a burger, got home, took 3 hour long nap.
• 10.10 | had uni, went to mcdonald’s, bought a book, went home and mentally died.
• 11.10 | woke up depressed, stayed that way the whole day. drank gin & tonic and self harmed and started splitting on my friend.
• 12.10 | went to the airport, to get mom and sister.
• 13.10 | went to alfa, bought alcohol and band aids for my wounds, went to a birthday party, got drunk, blacked out, threw up.
• 14.10 | got home, stayed in bed all day except for when i took a bath to change my band aids which was extremey stressful.
• 15.10 - 18.10 | too depressed
• 19.10 | sat in bed the whole day, cleaned the kitchen, cooked pasta for my sister, watched the latest shows.
• 20.10 | mom made me go to the store which i was barely able to do i even cried.
• 21.10 | memory impaired
• 22.10 | went to uni, barely woke up, at our break we went to lido to eat then participated in an experiment, which made me very stressful.
• 23.10 - 25.10 | too depressed
• 26.10 | cleaned the kitchen a bit had an incident with the stove, cleaned my room, watched the big bang theory, friends, went to the store with my mom.
• 27.10 | cleaned the rest of the house with the help of mom and step dad, close family members visited, there was yelling at some point and my little cousin was being very problematic.
• 28.10 | i dont’t know what my excuse was.
• 29.10 | can’t remember.
• 30.10 | woke up at like 6.50 am, went to uni in this cold weather, got home with a burger and took a long nap, plan not to sleep tonight.
• 31.10 | went to uni - english, then drove home took a nap, drove back to uni - bio medicine, then went home, ate an eclair, bought chips and lemon iced tea & finally wrote self reflection for uni and then watched friends.