the moon has awoken with the sleep of the sun, the light has been broken; the spell has begun

➸ daily.

• 01. ┊ got new glasses, finally got meds !!
• 02. ┊ drove to Līgatne
• 03. ┊ the x factor at 8pm
• 04. ┊ DBT at 2pm ; student id card sticker
• 05. ┊ MITSKI'S NEW SONG!!!
• 08. ┊ therapy at 3pm (zoom)
• 10. ┊ the x factor at 8pm
• 11. ┊ DBT at 2pm
• 15. ┊ you season 3 on netflix
• 17. ┊ the x factor at 8pm
• 18. ┊ DBT at 2pm
• 21. ┊ finished you season 3
• 23. ┊ THE OFFICE on netflix
• 25. ┊ DBT at 2pm
• 27. ┊ psychiatrist at 2.45pm ; therapy at 12
• 29. ┊ crisis
• 30. ┊ crisis
• 31. ┊ HALLOWEEN

➸ goals.

• read at least two books
• ✓ no or less dex
• finish my marvel marathon
• ▧ uni !!
• ✓ journal
• ▧ complete habits daily
• DBT
  • ✓ attend sessions
  • do homework
  • ✓ diary card

➸ to-do.

• ✓ finish midnight library
• ✓ sign uni contract
• ✓ clean the house
• start reading you

➸ media.

• tv
  • wandavision ♡ ↺
  • only murders in the building
  • squid game ♡
  • you
  • b99 ↺
  • the office ↺
• movies
  • captain marvel ♡ ↺
  • thor
  • diary of a wimpy kid
  • diary of a wimpy kid: rodrick rules
  • diary of a wimpy kid: dog days
  • knives out ♡ ↺
  • the last duel
• books
  • midnight library by matt haig ♡
• music
  • the adults are talking by the strokes
  • she's my collar by gorillaz
  • light of my life by dafna
  • exile by taylor swift feat bon iver
  • till forever falls apart by ash, FINNEAS

➸ quotes & lyrics.

• "You, Vision, are the piece of the Mind Stone that lives in me. You are a body of wires and blood and bone that I created. You are my sadness and my hope. But mostly, you're my love."
• "I think I've seen this film before and I didn't like the ending."'
• "I only remember feeling completely alone. Empty. I just...Endless nothingness."
• "It's just like this wave washing over me, again and again. It knocks me down, and when I try to stand up, it just comes for me again. And I...It's just gonna drown me."

➸ mental health.

• ups
  • at first I had less mood swings, good psychiatrist appointment, did my diary card and mood apps, attended group DBT, DBT addiction skills, helped my mood by watching beloved tv shows, drinking more water, less hallucinations, milder paranoia (sometimes), brushing my teeth more often, better hygiene, less coffee
• downs
  • OGC, benzos, ritalin, dex, didn't take meds regularly, didn't do DBT homework, crisis after crisis, self harm, relapse in bulimia, immense guilt, mood swings again, depression, severe anxiety, OCD, intrusive thoughts, superstitions, paranoia, hallucinations (mild), not eating enough, crying a lot, wanting to OD, unstable relationships, unstable goals, fear of abandonment at times, wasting all my money, being in destructive relationships, dissociation, losing time